A New Year!

Dear Marcus,

Christmas has come and gone, and you're still smiling!  I can't get over how different you are from your passionate brother.  You are easy come, easy go.  The only time you cry is when you are hungry.  And then, every once in a while you get a little gassy and you get upset.  The other night was the worst.  You cried for an hour and a half and I felt so bad for you!  The only time you were happy was when your Dad laid you on your  back and started pumping your legs.  I could not stop laughing because you immediately went from screaming to grinning and then right back to screaming as soon as he stopped!  If I did it, it just didn't work!

We had a lot of family over here for Christmas.  You got lots of snuggles, but you need your space sometimes.  You have adapted well to sleeping in your bed.  But, true to your self, you grin like crazy when I come get you out of the crib in the morning.

You are a big baby!  You are more long than chunky, but you look like a six month old and you are only four months.  You are finally starting to enjoy tummy time.  I think you realized that it's your ticket to crawling!  You are perfectly content playing with your feet and hands so toys don't realize entice you to move.  I do love how babies (including you!) have this ingrained sense that they are accomplishing things.  Whenever you do something new, you look at me like you just ran a marathon.  I guess for your little chunky body, it's similar!

I am having back surgery in two days.  I'm a little nervous, but ready to back to being a normal mom...whatever that means!  I have been very limited.  You probably haven't noticed, but your big brother certainly has! 

You are starting to get hungry, so I'd better go feed you.  I'm ready to see your sweet smile again!

I love you!

Mom

 

Merry Christmas!

Dear Marcus,

Every time I look at you, you've grown.  You are huge!  Last night, I put on a pair of OU jammies on you that your brother wore when he was seven months old.  You are so cute and so sweet.  You love to smile at people.  The other night, we had the Martin family over and you would not take your eyes off of Aunt Gayla.  Every time she looked at you, you would smile at her and start talking.  When she talked back, you went nuts!  You are a sweet, sweet baby boy.

You're sleeping through the night most nights.  If I keep you in the swing, you do fine, but we're working on sleeping in your bed.  Last night was your longest stint in the bed.  Five and a half hours!  You'll get it and before I know it, you'll be sleeping as long as Jordan!  It's so different with the second baby.  I was stressed all of the time about Jordan and trying to teach him how to sleep.  I worried about everything.  With you, I'm just going with the flow.  You are already in a great schedule and I didn't have to do anything!

You had your first fever this past week.  It was so sad.  You didn't understand why you felt so rotten!  Poor little guy.  At one point, you just looked at me and a big tear rolled down your cheek.  You were only sick for a day, though.  And unlike your brother, there were no trips to the ER!!

Last night, I heard your laugh for the first time.  Oh, it's cute (shocker!!).  And of course you laughed at your brother and your dad.  They were wrestling and you thought it was hilarious.  You love both of those guys already.  I can tell I am in trouble because you three are quite the team.  More girl's nights for me, I suppose!

This Christmas is so special.  I am so glad we have you.  I was thinking about the fact that last year at this time, we were getting ready for Baby Ruby and had no ideas that our hearts would soon be broken.  And then they would be restored by our good God who gave us YOU as a special and unexpected gift.  He is too good to us and we cherish you.

I love you, Buddy.  I can't wait to see our family dote on you over the next few days.  You are going to be spoiled rotten!

Love,

Mom

 

Smiley Guy

Dear Marcus,

We are two days away from your very first Thanksgiving!  I love this time of year especially because it makes me so aware of what God has done in our lives.  It's easy to focus on the negative...the loss of my dear friend to cancer, my upcoming back surgery, and financial struggles that we have.  But by focusing on what we do have, well, we recognize that we have everything we need. 

Elisabeth Eliot once said that there are two kinds of days.  No, not good days and bad days.  There are days where we are completely blessed and are needing/wanting very little.  And then there are days of grace.  Those are the days where you really are able to recognize God's provision.  When my friend Kelsey was dying of cancer, she often shared with me how she could not imagine how she would endure what was coming but she knew that God would give her grace at the time.  And I watched how God walked her through things I cannot even imagine.

All that to say, YOU are one of my three greatest blessings.  I am thankful for you, your brother, and your dad.  I have many other people...but you three are The Loves of my life.  I was nervous about having two, but I love every second I get to snuggle with you.  You have a precious smile and you love to talk to me.  But, you will smile at just about anything.  The paintings by your changing table, the shower curtain, and even the wall!

At three in the morning, you were laughing and talking to me.  I enjoyed it for a while and then let you continue the conversation with the animals on your swing.  I have no idea how long it took you to go back to sleep!

Keep on smiling, little guy.  You light up my life and the lives of everyone who comes around you!

I love you!  Happy Thanksgiving!

Mom

 

Slow Down, Please!

Dear Marcus,

Will you please stop growing?  Seriously.  It's happening too fast.  I'm not ready for you to be big.  Your newest thing is talking (which is hilarious) and you've found your hands.  It's so cute and yet, stop it!  This is the last new thing you are allowed to do this week!  It's funny because with your brother, I was so ready for him to reach all of these milestones.  I'm finding myself enjoying every single little stage you are in.  I am trying to savor every moment with you because I know that I will blink and you'll be a big boy.

I'm sure I will say this every post, but you are such a sweet baby.  You look at me with those big blue eyes and I melt.  You'll probably learn to use that against me. :)

I want you to know that I treasure you and am so thankful that God gave you to us...you are a good gift from Him!  God is constantly reminding me that He is good and that He knows what is best for our family.  The Bible says that we can make plans but God is going to take us down the best path for us.  It's comforting to know this because all of my plans never seem to be as good as what God has in store for me.

Your dad and I are going to start praying for you and your brother.  We have a list of specific qualities (like courage and purity) that we are going to pray constantly for you to grow in.  Most importantly, we are going to pray that God will change your heart and you will choose salvation at an early age. 

We love you so much, little guy.  I am so thankful for your precious life.

Love,

Mom

Sweetness

Dear Marcus,

You are growing up too fast!  The days are flying by.  It's hard to believe you are almost two months old.  So sad!  But you are such a sweet boy, so I am trying to cherish every moment.  You have these beautiful blue eyes and you love to gaze at things, including my face.  I could hold you all day, but unluckily for both of us, things have to get done so you have to gaze at your toys instead.  It doesn't seem to bother you as much as it bothers me!

You are starting to coo and to smile.  I feel like you're going to have a serous sense of humor.  You don't smile a lot but your eyes are always happy.  You are going to be silly!

You are a tough little guy.  I knew you would have to be with your crazy older brother.  You've taken a few shots to the head and just kind of blinked and moved on.  You'll be as big as him soon enough and can take him on!

I am looking forward to your next appointment next week.  It will be fun to see how much you've grown.  You are HUGE!  Your legs are getting chunky, which is just too cute!  You still have that big full head of hair...the question is, will it be blonde, brown, or red like your Pappa?

You are a sweet blessing to our family little man and I'm looking forward to seeing you grow in wisdom, stature, and in favor with God and with man.

I love you!

Mom

 

One Month Already

Dear Marcus,

The goal of these letters is that I write them every week, but for some reason, having two little boys has made that harder!  Now that you are a little bigger, I'm starting to get the hang of this and will try to do it more often.  It seems like you change every day!  You are getting a little chunky and staying awake for longer periods of time.  I am constantly amazed at how laid back you are!  You will sit and look at a toy or the back of the couch for long stretches of time!  Sometimes I feel guilty because I use that to my advantage and get things done instead of holding you.  But don't worry, I sneak in plenty of snuggle times with you.

Your Grammy and Pappa are here, so it is fun to let them do things with you.  They both enjoy feeding you bottles and talking to you.  You try to talk back and just look at them for long periods of time.  The thing we laugh about the most with you is your burps!  It is so funny to hear such a loud and obnoxious belch come out of such a sweet, tiny boy.  Jordan even answers the question "What does Marcus say?" with "Burp, burp". 

Being flexible is nice because we can get out and enjoy activities as a family.  The other evening we took Jordan to Mardel to buy him his first Bible.  You just tagged along and didn't make a peep!  It won't be long and we will be taking you to buy a Bible.  I hope you understand what a blessing it is for us to have God's Word in our language.  There are many around the world who do not or are not allowed to have a Bible.

Little man, you are such a blessing to our family.  I could not love you more.  I am so looking forward to watching you grow up, but at the same time I am trying to savor every day I have with you.  You are precious!

I love you!

Mom

Welcome, Sweet Boy!

Dear Marcus,

I started a blog for your brother to keep track of all of the fun and special things that he does.  I am so excited to start yours!  You have been with us for a week now and it feels like it's been forever.  I cannot imagine life without you.  You are a sweet blessing for our family.  Before we found out you were on the way, we had struggled with infertility for a long time.  Then after we adopted Jordan, we tried to adopt again, only to have our hearts broken three times in a year with failed adoptions.  We still love and pray for Jake, Millie, and Ruby. 

After so much hurt and struggle, finding out I was pregnant with you was a complete shock!  I cannot believe that God would choose to bless us with such a precious little boy.  You are polar opposites from your brother.  You are so relaxed and calm.  People keep telling me that it will wear off, but I can tell...you are just pure sweetness!

You came about three weeks before your due date.  It was such a blessing to have your Grammy and Pappa here from Africa for your arrival.  They love you so much as do many, many people who have been anxiously awaiting you.  There are so many people praying for you, little man and I look forward to see how God will answer those prayers.  I am praying that you will grow in to a man who loves God and will serve him no matter what comes.

I look forward to every stage of your life.  I am enjoying the newborn stage right now!  All you really do is eat and sleep.  You only cry when you have your diaper changed or get really hungry.  You are a piece of cake and unbelievably sweet! 

Well, I love you, buddy.  I look forward to writing to you and letting you know just how special you are.

Love,

Mom